Unthinkable Thoughts
by Bethezda
Summary: Hermione Granger struggles with her feelings for Draco Malfoy. On one hand, she absolutely hates him. On the other, she admires him. Can she cope with her rising feelings for him. More importantly, can Harry and Ron cope? Will be rated T soon.
1. It Began as Anger

**Unthinkable Thoughts**

**By Bethezda**

**A/N: I have a few stories going on at once. I will try to update soon. **

A view inside Hermione Granger's mind:

_Draco is just so aggravating! Does his arrogance never subside? Oh, how he irks me. Not only does he exhibit qualities of a Slytherin (particularly hatred of muggle-borns), but he never fails to come up with a snide remark. Sometimes I wish I was that witty. Oh, no did I just say that? I just can't have anything positive to say about him, can I? Look at me, questioning myself. I am Hermione Granger, and I DON'T have feelings for Draco Malfoy._

**Chapter One**

"Ah, it's good to be back at Hogwarts," I sighed as I walked through the doors to the Great Hall with one of my two best friends, Ron Weasley. We were in our sixth year and had only one year left to go. Harry had not yet arrived, but I was sure he would be here soon. We took a seat at the Gryffindor House table, anxious to get on with the feast.

"What's Malfoy looking so smug about?" Ron said, pointing towards the Slytherin table, where Draco Malfoy was smiling in a manner that indicated he was up to no good. I just shrugged. We would probably find out sooner or later.

Not very much later, the Sorting Hat began to sing. Its song was quite unsettling, warning us to stick together in the great perils to come. Immediately after that, Professor McGonagall brought out an old stool and began sorting first years into Houses.

Somewhere in between the Sorting Hat's cries, there was an eruption at the end of our table. Seamus Finnigan, a boy in our year, never could get his wand to work right. While trying to impress a new first year who had been sorted into our House, he made his drink explode and soak the poor first year. I rolled my eyes. McGonagall ignored the outburst and continued sorting.

Soon, the Sorting Hat had gone through all the first years and the feast began. I began to worry. Harry still hadn't showed up yet. I was about to voice my concerns to Ron when the feast began. We were just moving on to dessert when the doors to the Great Hall opened and Harry entered, led by our potions master, Severus Snape. Neither one of them looked happy.

_Oh, boy, _I thought. Harry's face was covered in blood from the nose down. "What happened?" I asked as he sat down.

"Malfoy…" Harry began. "Tell you later."

I shouldn't have needed to ask. Of _course _it was Malfoy. No wonder he had looked so smug. I would make him pay for this. I shot him a look of daggers. He just laughed and clutched his nose. He was mocking me! God, he was so aggravating! He needed to be taught a lesson. Maybe I should have backed off, but I was just so angry. I took a few calming breaths and turned towards Harry.

"You missed most of the feast, Harry," Ron mumbled with a mouth full of treacle tart. Harry paid no mind to that, digging into the array of foods before him like a starving man. He had only taken a few bites when the food disappeared.

"Prefects!" Our headmaster raised his voice above all of the noise in the room. "Lead the first years to the dormitories, if you will."

"That's our cue," I said grudgingly as I stood. "You _will _tell us later, won't you, Harry?"

"Of course."

I got up and called, "Gryffindor first years! Follow me, please!" As I walked away, I wondered what I was going to do with Malfoy.


	2. First Day of School

**Unthinkable Thoughts**

**By Bethezda**

**A/N: I apologize for such short chapters. I am trying to write longer chapters now. There will be some more action very soon. The first chapter was just establishing the time and setting, the basics. **

**I do not own Harry Potter or its characters.**

**Chapter Two**

Back at the common room, Weasleys' Wizard Wheezes were going around. There were several bad cases of nosebleed nougats, puking pastels, and more. I, as a prefect, had a hard time sorting things out. These had been banned since last year, so I was expected to get to the source of it. By the time things got sorted out, I was exhausted. I went straight to my four-poster bed. And what do you think I find there on my pillow? A letter.

_Dear Hermione,_

_Things are becoming far worse. Your father and I are trying to get past this, but things aren't looking too well. We received a letter from your Aunt Cilia. Your grandmum has passed. This was the cherry on top of the cake of misfortune. I believe this is only the beginning of many tragedies to come. _

_We have also received a threatening letter. Do you have any idea what a mudblood is? Whoever sent it told us our mudblood was next. _

_Yours always,_

_Mum_

At this, my eyes filled with unshed tears and my heart started racing. I didn't have time to grieve, for the door opened and in came Lavender Brown.

"Hello, Hermione," she trilled in her annoyingly happy voice.

"Hi, Lavender."

"Is something wrong?" She didn't even wait for an answer before she launched into another question. "How was your summer? Can you believe Harry is the captain of our Quidditch team? What do you think of Ron this year? He looks handsome." God, she was annoying.

"I'm sorry, Lavender," I said, "but I'm extremely tired. I was just going to sleep."

"Oh. Okay." Lavender didn't look phased at all. She probably would have kept talking, not waiting for an answer, if I hadn't said anything.

I woke up the next morning to untamable hair. I brushed it and brushed it, but I eventually had to use my wand. After all that, I realized I was late for Defense Against the Dark Arts. Great. Snape would probably deduct House points. Add that to the list of tragedies my mum mentioned.

We had Defense Against the Dark Arts with the Slytherins this year. Again. As I walked into the classroom, all eyes turned towards me. Someone snickered. I bet it was Malfoy. I kept my head held high, refusing to show weakness in front of him. He would not have that satisfaction. I wouldn't give that to him. My actions probably didn't work anyway, because I was blushing furiously. I just took my seat next to Ron and Harry.

Snape droned on and on in his monotonous voice. I found it hard to pay attention today. Maybe it was because _Malfoy _kept getting away with things. He threw flying paper birds. He made snide comments. And Snape let him _get away with all of it_. I just can't stand Malfoy. Why do the Slytherins get special privileges? I'm scaring myself with my dark thoughts. What is with me lately? Calm down, Hermione.

Defense Against the Dark Arts passed too slowly for my taste. It seemed to take hours. By the time it was over, I was about ready to rip my hair out. And then we had N.E.W.T. level potions with Professor Slughorn. I was quite anxious to meet him. I made my way down to the dungeons, for the first time without dread. Well, I guess I was kind of dreading it because we also have potions with the _Slytherins_. Well, now my dark feelings are making me contradict myself. How pleasant.

Harry and Ron came in late and unprepared. They had to use textbooks from the cupboard.

"You are to make a Draught of Living Death. Just a drop of this is quite deadly," Professor Slughorn said in his scratchy voice. "The person to make the best Draught of Living Death will win a bottle of Felix Felicis. Now can anyone tell me what Felix Felicis is?"

Immediately, I raised my hand. Of course I was the only one to raise my hand. Malfoy snickered again. I glared at him.

"Yes, uh… Miss…"

"Granger, sir," I said. "Felix Felicis brings its user luck."

"You are quite right, Miss Granger. Ten points to Gryffindor." At this, Malfoy scowled. I smiled. Serves him right. "You may begin preparing your potion."

I have to say, the Draught of Living Death was harder to make than the textbook made it sound. Harry seemed to have a better time of it than anyone. How did he manage to make his better than mine? I was struggling. I _never _struggle. And Harry was doing it with ease. By the time mine was a nice purple color, Harry's was done to perfection. It amazed me. I would have to ask him later how he did it. So of course Harry won the Felix Felicis. I admit, I was a tad bit jealous.

By the time we got out of potions, Malfoy's face was a nice beet red. He certainly wasn't happy to be bested by Harry. He was shocked by the way Slughorn treated him, as if he was in the same rank as the Gryffindors. I was very pleased to see him so flustered.

Since we didn't have Care of Magical Creatures, we used our free period to go visit Hagrid. We made our way down to his hut and were greeted enthusiastically by an excited Fang. Fang is Hagrid's giant dog. Hearing Fang's barks, Hagrid came around from the garden behind his hut and picked us up in a huge hug. Hagrid is a half-giant, so he's eight feet tall and very strong.

"Harry, Ron, Hermione!" Hagrid bellowed. "Come 'round tonight. I've someone I'd like yer to meet."

_Oh, no, _I thought. _It had better not be another of his pets. Grawp was bad enough last year. _I'm sure Harry and Ron were thinking along the same lines.

"Will I be seein' yeh in Care o' Magical Creatures, then?" Hagrid asked.

We looked down and shuffled our feet guiltily. None of us had signed up for Hagrid's class this year. We just hadn't the time. Hagrid looked offended.

"Right, then," he said, brushing us off casually. "I'll see yeh later." Hagrid stalked off slowly, not once glancing back.

Harry, Ron, and I made our may back to Hogwarts with our hearts in our heels.

Harry, as Quidditch team captain, scheduled tryouts for today. Several girls from other Houses showed up, hoping to get close to Harry. After about the sixth, Harry ordered anyone not in Gryffindor to go to the bleachers. A gang of giggling girls proceeded to do so. And so Quidditch tryouts began.

Cormac McLaggen and Ron both tried out for Keeper. Cormac was good. Too good. Ron was struggling. I swear Cormac had already gotten four out of five saves. I just had to do something drastic. I used the Confundus charm on Cormac. Hopefully no one noticed. At least Ron got his five out of five saves.

After Ron beat Cormac, Cormac threw a fit. That stuck-up mommy's boy started arguing with Harry about who should have gotten on the team.

"Ron beat you fair-and-square," Harry yelled. _Boys._

Everyone was pretty tired, and it was getting dark. So we went downstairs to the Great Hall, ate our supper, and retired to bed. I stayed up and wrote all of this down in my diary. Now I'm going to bed.

**A/N: Please review. Constructive criticism and ideas accepted. What do you think so far? **


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